Why didn't they tell me that blood was this hard to scrub off your hands? I already made two mistakes. First of all, clearly, I forgot the gloves. Oh yeah, Danny, Danny, don't forget your gloves. Blah, Blah, Blah! Even after Mom constantly nagged me about them, I still forgot them! Second, I am pretty darn sure that carrying old Donald here in the trunk was a bad idea. I mean, his grimy DNA is probably all over my car! Ughhhhhh. What am I supposed to do? Mom and Dad are gonna be so mad at me for screwing up my first run. My first run!
Okay, so I should probably explain what is happening. I'm Danny Bakor, and my parents run the “Bakor Bakery”. Cute name, right? Wrong. What you couldn't possibly tell by the sugar-coated and frosting-covered little store is; that it's the secret hideout for the cult that practically runs our neighborhood. My parents are pretty much the leaders of the whole thing. They even set the record for “Most Sacrifices in a Week.” Yeah. I know. I've got a lot to live up to, and considering I already screwed up my first freaking run, I don't think it's going too great.
Oh god. Sorry, he's already beginning to smell. I am trying to drive him to the spot as quickly as possible so my alibi still checks out. Man, it really sounds like I don't know what I am doing. It's just when you get in the heat of the moment you…..
Anyways, you are now probably wondering why I am telling you all of this when clearly I could shut my whole organization down and send myself straight to the big house. Well, we've got a….. problem. Our little posse we have is starting to be under suspicion (yes, I can see I am not helping it out). I just need to get mystery out there before my whole family and everyone I know “mysteriously disappears” because of the government. “I exist. I am living and breathing, and I have made a difference in our cause.” -Bakor's motto.
You see,Mom says they take people like us away, and nobody ever hears from us again. They take the people who want to see a better, more powerful Earth, and accuse their practices of being “wrong”. Well, I call bullcrap on that. Actually, it may be true but I don't really care. I just want to survive within my own world, and maybe even be good at my job. My kill, Donald, is supposed to make it all go away. He was a little too interested in our group at the bakery. The mistakes I made are just adding to the many that were already there. I just wanna help, and all I am doing is just digging ourselves a bigger hole, and one day, we won't be able to get out of it.
I made that analogy because, well, that is exactly what I am doing. This blessed shovel isn't worth crap. I bet you it'll break before I even finish digging. Another mistake. Welp, Donnie ol´ boy, I hope you like a shallow grave, because that's all you're going to get. Dear Lucifer, he's heavy. Trying to move this bowling ball of a man is ridiculous! He must weigh at least 500 lbs! Urrrrrrrrrrrrrrgggghhhhhhhhhhh. *Thump* Urrrrrgggggghhhhhhh *Thump* All I can do is roll him to the hole I so enthusiastically dug.
My god. You should see him! Hahahahahahahahahaa! The hole *snort* is too small! He's somehow sandwiched between the dirt! How does this even happen? Okay then, guess I have to dig around him… Or I could jump on him and force him in! I did not think he was this massive! I am honestly kind of proud of myself for this kill, he was a biggin´! This is crazy! I can't believe-
What was that? I swear I just heard something. I better hurry. Shoving a clearly murdered body into a random hole in the woods surely would not look good on my resume. Damn, it's almost 11. I really, really need to hurry. Digging this new hole is putting a damper on my extra time…..Finally! Dang it, Donald, if I had a decent weighted individual, maybe this would have gone a lot smoother.
Now, the drive back to the Bakery needs to be calm, no speeding. Breathe. I am coming home from the yeast pickup.I am coming home from the yeast pickup. I've got the packages in the back of my car, and I look totally and completely calm. Go to the bakery, Danny, go on. Close up the store and bring in the yeast.
The bakery's lights are on. Good.The plan is still going well. Now, I just need to go in, flip the sign to “closed”, put the yeast away, and mark my kill. This is simple, right? God, no, who am I kidding? I just murdered someone! I don't look calm! I look crazy! My hands are shaky, my eyes are open to max capacity, and I can't seem to make this twitch in my neck stop twitching. How does everyone else do it so easily and I am struggling so badly? I did well in training. In fact, they let me do my run early due to my promising results. I can't let them down. I have to prove that I am a valuable asset to the organization. I'm not doing this kill for me, this is a kill for us.
The shelf for yeast in the pantry has always been a little too high for me so I kinda expected this outcome. With my ankle swelling and an array of white powder scattered everywhere, this mess is taking way longer than it should to clean up. Grrrr. I'm already late and have plenty of mistakes to report, why not add a mess to the mix?
Ah!
Jeez, I am jumpy. It was just the door. “We're closed, can't you see the sign?” What kind of idiot walks into a closed bakery at 11:30 at night? I just want to get downstairs for my fami-
“Excuse me?” a girl speaks.
“Uh, yeah?”
“Are you Danny? Danny Bakor?”
“Who's asking?” I'm closer now, but it's dark. Can't see her.
“Oh, uhm. I am Kinley Finland. Donald Finland's daughter. I uh can't seem to find him and this was the last place he'd told me he was going.” Her voice cracks on the last sentence.
“Oh yeah, he came in today.” Oh Christ, why did I tell her that?! Idiot. Now she knows he was here! Another mistake. That makes five. No. No. No. If our own government isn't the one to kill me, it will sure as hell be my family.
“Well, do you have any idea where he may be? He was supposed to be home hours ago.”
“I'm sorry,I don't. He came in, picked up his order, and left. Now, you need to leave too.” God, woman. Leave already. I can't be stupid anymore. I can't.
“Wait! At least have my number. If you find out anything, and I mean anything, please call me.” Her shaky hands make this ordeal much slower than it needs to be.
“Will do.”
Will not. I need to do something about her. I can't have her worrying about her dead father whose death needs to be a secret. How did I not know of his daughter? This is not good. I noticed on her way out that she looked back. She has hope he is still out there. Oh, he's out there sweetheart, just not the way you want him to be.
The basement of the bakery is cold as always. There's nowhere I could run if I wanted to. Mom looks ecstatic to see that I have at least returned safely, but frowns at the sight of my stained hands.
“Got ahead of yourself, eh?” She sounds sarcastic. They all laugh. Shut up. I got him, didn't I?
“Seems so.”
“Go on. Mark it. You did a good job, Danny. You are truly part of the family now.”
I nod as some sort of response, feeling a strong sense of pride. I am finally here. This must be what it feels like to hit that ball out of the park and take a victory lap. It's wonderful. I better get over myself, I still have to report my mistakes on the board. It dawns on me that I made more than four.
I know they don't mean it when they say congratulations. I may now be a part of them, but I see the fear in their eyes after they read my mistakes. We may be done. Dad wants to speak to me now. We all know what is going to happen. No one wants to say it.
There's a reason I harp so much on the fact that I made mistakes. Once you reach five, you're an ailment to the cause. You aren't an “us” now. You are you. Singular. And they don't tolerate individuals. You must be eliminated.
“I'm sorry son. You knew the risk, and you made the mistakes.”
“No, Dad! I can fix it! I swear!” He needs to listen to me! I can! Please!
“You know the rules, Danny.”
“Please I can-”
RIIIIIIIIIIIIIINGG. RIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIINGG. RIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIINGG.
“Answer it.” Oh, god. It's Kinley.
“H-hello?” She explains she found her father's watch, and that she knows where he may have gone. She wants me to go with her. Damn it! Wait. I have an idea. I'll tell the group!
“What did she say?” He knows it was the daughter. How?
“Oh, um that she wanted me to help her find her father.”
“Damn it, Danny! See, this is why we can't risk you being out there!”
“No, no! I have a plan! I could "help" her find her father, but really eliminate her and the rest of the mistakes I've made! We could still thrive!” It hurts to see Dad actually have to look at the rest of the group to know if I should have a chance at living. Maybe we are cruel.
“Fine. You have one shot. You screw this up, you screw us all up.”
It's weird to know something that someone else doesn't. I know that I killed Kinley's father and I don't know why that bothers me as much as it does. Maybe it's the way she looks at me when she thinks she finds something. So hopeful.
No, Danny. We can't have this. We are going to kill her. Don't get all soft now! I just need to pretend to care.
But, she seems like the only real thing in my life right now.
No! Don't you want a life?! You'll die if she isn't eliminated.
But..
No.
I-
“Danny?” she says softly.
“Yeah?”
“I think, uh.”
“You think what?”
“I think my trail leads….back to the bakery.”
“What? No. I was just there.”
“No, seriously Danny! I think it might be involved with your parents!”
Damn it. Damn it. Damn it! How could she possibly know? She couldn't. My mistakes weren't that bad. Play along. If she has suspicions about my parents, she must have some suspicions about me, right?
Kinley has such a sure look in her eyes. She looks like she solved the world's hardest puzzle and is standing in front of a stadium of cheering fans. Except she is standing in front of a tiny bakery at 3 in the morning and may have solved her father's murder. She's lost in her own mind. But, there is a sense of regret. Why?
“Danny, I´m sorry.”
“It couldn't possibly be my parents. I am telling you.” I need to kill her once we get inside. I have the plan already. She'll confront my parents and I'll hit her in the head. I'll do it. Lose this feeling you have. I love my family, right? More than I love some stupid girl who is about to put all of us in jail or have the government take us all away. I must. I did one kill for us, I can do it again.
“There are some things I haven't told you.” She sounds sad.
“What?” What could I possibly not know?
“I saw your father around our house today. I don't think Father invited him over.”
“Okay?” What was Dad doing at my kill's house? I thought he didn't know him.
“What I am saying is that I think he and your mother were planning on killing him.”
“That couldn't be.” Dad knew it was Kinley on the phone, I wasn't even told that Donald had a daughter. I was supposed to be aware of all things of the kill. They knew about her. They knew I would make mistakes. They knew.
“Just let me confront them, but I don't think I'm wrong.” You're not.
Her hug feels tight and warm. She really feels sorry.
“Let's go.” My voice sounds shaky. I'm scared too.
With it being pitch black outside and about to enter a basement, it's pretty darn hard to see. I hope they know that my bringing her is part of my plan. I go in first, but the lights are still dim here too. I have to squint to see that nearly everyone is missing. I see Dad.
“Hey, Dad. This is Kinley, and she would like to ask you some questions.” I need to confront him myself about my run. If it was designed for me to fail, I want to know why.
“Mr. Bakor, I need you to answer me honestly. Did you kill my father?” He looks back and forth, he's waiting for me to do it. He's waiting for me to kill. He raises his eyebrows and sees I am not doing it so he grabs a wooden plank and knocks her in the side of the head.
“KINLEY!” No no no no no no no no. This is all my fault. I shouldn't have brought her down here. God, she's so limp. She breathes. Limp but alive.
“YOU CARE FOR HER?” Dad roars with anger! “YOU MUST KILL HER!”
“No!” I can't do this again! This is wrong! We are wrong!
“It's her or both of you, Danny! Make your choice!”
“I can't! I can't do it, Dad! This is WRONG!” He's grabbing a knife! Dad, no!
“I love her Dad!” He raises it above her defenseless body.
“POLICE OFFICERS! PUT YOUR WEAPONS DOWN!” I am blinded by flashlights as I cower over Kinley. This is too much. Everything goes black.
All I see is white. Too bright. I look over and see Kinley awake. Her temple is a gross purple-blue bump.
“Kinley!” She's okay! I'm okay!
“Danny!”
“What happened? How did the police get there?”
“I asked them to watch over the place when I got there because I feared my life.” She sounds exhausted. The police were there the entire time. She's a sneaky little detective.
“They are in custody, they've admitted to my f-f-father's murder.” She breaks down crying. I take the stupid IV out of my arm and rush to her side. Her tears soak through the clean shirt I don't recognize.
“I am going to see my father, I'll be back.”
“No,” *sniff* “let me go with you.” She wipes away any evidence of sadness and looks towards the door with determination.
I get to see my father through a wall of bars and get to talk in the privacy of a school locker room. I asked Kinley to let me speak with him alone first. He doesn't look regretful. I guess their delusions about the government aren't true. Was there anything they said that was true?
“Why did you and Mom rig my run?” I whisper, hoping the guard doesn't care. He doesn't.
“We didn't.” He looks away.
“Cut the crap. Tell me the truth, you are stuck here for life anyway.”
“I let you free. Don't you see? You aren't the one behind the bars.” He's right, they didn't rat me out. I guess some paternal instincts still exist inside them.
“You didn't answer my question.”
“....we didn't want to be the ones to let us down. We thought it would be easier if you did.” So they thought that maybe they could still be held in high respect when they went down if I was the one who caused their demise. They knew the organization was dying, they just didn't want it to be their fault. Selfish pigs.
“I am your son. You've screwed me over enough, let's see how much mercy karma will give ya.” I don't look back as I walk away. I am cleared of my parents, but something still eats away at my mind. Kinley. Donald. Murder. I still murdered her father.
I grab her shoulders and apologize for everything that happened. I embrace her and savor the way this hug feels. I let go after a long period of time. This may be the last I have. I've lived a life of hate and death, I need to pave the road to redemption. I killed your father. I killed your father. I killed your fa-
“Kinley, I have something to tell you….”
Hailie Woodring is a dorky, bubbly blonde who loves writing, snuggling her dogs, and true crime. She can't wait to get out of boring Muncie, Indiana and pursue her dream college while majoring in forensic science. Previously, her work has been published through oddball Magazine and Eber and Wein publishing.
